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| Learning
to talk to yourself in ways that motivate and encourage is crucial to your
personal and professional success. If you ignore this basic fact, you'll
pay a hefty price in your happiness and well being. Each of us can
instill positive thinking that motivate us to new levels of success. |
Positive Thinking
A good definition of a positive thought
is one that supports you in being and achieving your best - thoughts that increase
your self esteem, increase happiness, and support the achievement of your goals,
desires, and dreams.
We are constantly judging, interpreting
and commenting on the world, ourselves and other people. However, most of us
are not aware that much of this inner dialogue is holding us back from reaching
our highest potential. Don't fall into the trap of assuming that your automatic
thoughts are serving your interests.
Consider the following example. A
woman has started an exercise and diet program. She is enthused and follows
the program to the letter. In a few weeks, she begins to see results and is
encouraged by her progress. One afternoon, she opens the refrigerator to find
a piece of chocolate cake. Immediately and without her being aware, her inner
dialogue whispers:
"That cake will taste great.
I exercised today and I've earned a reward. I deserve it. Its not that much.
" She eats the cake but even before she is done, her inner dialogue scolds:
"I have no control. I'll have
to work much harder now. This fitness stuff is too hard. My diet isn't working.
Its not worth continuing. I am doomed to be out of shape."
Her negative thoughts have cost her
twice! Her fitness goal was undermined and then her self esteem and confidence
were damaged. This is one small example of hundreds and maybe even thousands
of times in a single day when we behave in ways that don't align with the goal
of a happy, successful life. In silent, subtle ways we sabotage ourselves and
our dreams - we avoid a person or situation, we give it less than our best shot,
we give up too early, we assume someone is reacting negatively to us, etc. Its
clear that negative thoughts hurt our chances for success. Without consciously
implementing positive thinking programming, our results will probably
remain unchanged over the years.
The first step in positive affirmation
training is developing an awareness of your internal dialogue. When you do,
you may be surprised at what you find: I can't do it, I never finish anything,
Its too hard. These are just a few examples of common, everyday negative thinking
patterns. You will need to exert some effort, especially at first, to identify
these negative thoughts as they occur. The trick is to become good at noticing
them. Make a commitment today to carry a notebook with you for a few hours and
capture as many automatic negative thoughts as you can. Even in this short period
of time, you will begin to see some re-occurring patterns.
Once you are aware of your inner
dialogue, it's easy to view negative thoughts as a plague that must be eliminated!
Actually, these thoughts are a natural function of the mind to protect you from
pain such as failure or embarrassment. The goal of affirmation training is not
to eliminate your inner dialogue, as if that were even possible! The goal is
to manage and improve this automatic dialogue. Its possible to create
habitual positive thoughts that support you instead of defeat you.
How do you do it? The same way your
current dialogue got installed - repetition. With enough practice of positive
affirmations, your thoughts, feelings and behaviors will support you instead
of hindering you. Positive thinking training, like a workout session
at a gym, is not a cure but rather a process. Think of it as a healthy habit
that you will gladly practice for your entire life. It is not difficult and
does not take a lot of time but it does take repetition and consistency.
When do you know you have it? There
comes a point in your training when a negative thought arises and it occurs
simply as an invitation. You experience it not as a command, but as a choice.
You then have the freedom to make the choice that serves your highest good.
With affirmation training, positive thoughts occur naturally and you are able
to behave in a way that supports you and your goals.
Going back to the example above,
lets look at some healthy self talk that would produce a much different
result:
"I love feeling and looking
fit. That cake doesn't taste as good as being fit feels. I'm proud of my efforts
and discipline. I look good now and I intend to look even better in the future.
Staying fit is possible for me."
She chooses to not eat the cake.
Now she benefits twice - she is proud of her decision and her fitness goal is
intact. Now she really does deserve a reward - a healthy one!
The road to thinking positive
begins by observing and studying your own inner dialogue and practicing writing,
listening, and speaking positive affirmations. You'll be glad you did.
MORE ARTICLES:
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"...Like any deeply rooted habit,
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Understanding Self-Talk
Self Talk is a self help technique
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dialogues with ourselves constantly whether we are aware of it or not. We also
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The Power of a Positive
Attitude
"....Negative thoughts can get
in the way of concentration and confidence. Thoughts such as, "Don't miss
the shot" or "Don't strike out" generally causes you to do the
exact thing you were trying to avoid. Instead of dwelling on a poor performance,
remind yourself that you can do it. Rather than blaming factors you can't control,
focus on changes you can make to improve your performance. Positive thinking
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Your Thoughts and Performance
"...So what exactly is self-talk?
Cox defines self-talk as an effective technique for controlling thoughts
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Whether You Think You Can,
Or Think You Can't, You're Right
"What triggers your emotional
reaction to an event is the way you think about the event, not the event itself.
Anxiety doesnt just float around in the air waiting to pounce; it is internal,
that is, it exists inside your head. A shift in your thoughts or your perspective
on the event, or your beliefs in your ability to perform and cope effectively,
can change your emotional reality and consequently your performance." MORE>>